three years down

Finally got to celebrate 'versary this weekend with hikes and dinner at our fave place, Park Bruge. 

We talked about our fave things we did together this year, like our New York trip, and what we are looking forward to doing together in the coming year, like hiking and camping in the Shenendoah and Smokies this summer and visiting Ireland (gosh we really hope) this time next year. 

We also talked about the brilliant question from Scott and Ryan's show that day: if Space Jam were made today, which players would be in it?

And for Craig, in case that card I wrote you gets lost in the wind or the fire, or if I am quick to forget...

I just want to thank you for making my days light. For liking the new Justin Timberlake album as much as I do. For the recently when you so quickly and confidently made the decision to go to Cold Stone. I'm still torn between the two flavor combos I was debating between, but it doesn't  really matter because in the moment, I loved the ice cream I had, and sometimes life is to be enjoyed not analyzed.

Thank you for the time you basically ate pasta with gravy sauce because I didn't realize how essential the right amount of cheese is to properly make alfredo, and didn't really look to see just how much cheese we had, and was stubborn as always not to go back on my plan of "making dinner out of what we already had in the pantry!" Thanks not because you trust me with these things, but because you let me do them anyway and you go along. Like that time I dragged us hopelessly though Brooklyn, in search of anything cool.

But thanks also for the times when you don't just go along. When you frown at my casually going along with the idea of being a universalist... if I'm just saying it because it is easy and not because it is faithful, you'll always frown and you always should. Thank you for pushing me in the gym and not letting me stop just because my left arm can't lift its side of the weight... my right arm can and my left arm can catch up.

Thank you for the promise of a bulldog and that you'll do yoga with me someday.
And for daydreaming.
And for liking my fake glasses.

Thank you for eating burritos without meat sometimes, even though I don't think that has anything to do with me. You make me feel like it is okay to think about what I eat and change the things I eat... but thank you for being real with me about when I'm being a bitch about it. Thank you for growing with me and for the unspoken ways you've shown me that with you I am safe to grow.

Thank you most of all for what you give me every day-- love, support, and effort. And for helping me see Jesus everyday and pushing me toward him even when I'm stubborn.

Did I refer to myself as stubborn twice in this thank you note? I think that's about right. "Thank you," simply, because I'm stubborn. Thank you, for being you with me. 

happy things

Light thru trees

Color

New office

The dream of having a bulldog

priorities

sometimes I wake up at 6:00 just to watch a show that I missed the night before

sometimes I stay at work or the gym longer than planned just because I'm having fun

sometimes people and purpose push dinner way back and I don't even mind

sometimes I remember to brew coffee every morning, and keep sipping until lunch

sometimes I sleep in

sometimes I let the bold lines that compartmentalize my life blur just a bit

sometimes I just GO

sometimes I buy everything at once and then nothing for months

sometimes I want to read everything at once and then nothing for months

sometimes I choose the bus over walking

sometimes I prefer sunshine

sometimes I can't remember the last time I did laundry

sometimes life looks like this

the new york city

It all started when I was booking my Jan-Feb Megabus tickets sometime mid-December. There was an offer for free bus tickets on select dates, so I spontaneously grabbed two one way tickets to New York to use when Craig finished finals. Then there was a Christmas present to see the Knicks at MSG. Before we knew it we had a really fun three days to look forward to. It took forever for the end of February to come, but now it has came and passed and how the heck is it March 6 today???

Anyway, if you care (because I'm probably just writing the rest of this for myself and like, my mom...) here's what we did.

We ended up staying right across from where Razorback alum watch games apparently. I have no idea if any of them were there watching the Hogs lose to LSU... 

Then to Greenwich Village we went to kill time before the Knicks-Warriors game. I wore blue pants so that I could cheer for either team.

More neighborhood wandering the next morning, which was the most beautiful day in the world. Now I really want to live in Morningside Heights We even found a Presbyterian Church... maybe they'll hire us?

...and if the the church won't take us, we'll just be students at Columbia. Why not?

Also the best apple cider was happening around there. 

The a stroll through Central Park...

...took us to the Central Park Zoo which was was supposed to be a way to kill time before the Jimmy Fallon show but it was amazing and now I'm obsessed with sea lions. 

Also, the polar bear was napping which made him look less like a predator and more like the Coca-Cola variety.

There was also some Brooklyn... which was at first picture-perfect. And then, I don't know... confusing? Do you have to live there for it to be cool? Do you have to know it? Maybe you just have to not be headed out of town dragging a suitcase behind you. (I know. Weird decision.)

And some Union Square.

And then there was running and panic all the way down to the river past a bunch of construction, past any sign of life or busses... but sure enough there it was, waiting inconspicuously... until the engine started, that is, and Craig guessed the transmission was shot... but! We made it home! and through the first week of March! AND today we're rewarded with a snow day! 

That is all. 

february fourteen

On this day in 2008 I stole a cheese quesadilla from a Taco Bell drive thru. It's true. I don't remember how it happened exactly. I think I honestly forgot to pay... although I think it's just as likely that I honestly forgot my wallet and panicked.

I was on my way to hang with my two favorite guy friends from my German studies trip the previous summer. It was the first time the three of us had been able to hang out together since the trip and it hadn't occurred to me until too late that we planned it for Valentine's Day. On the one hand that felt awkward, but on the other hand I was relieved to have plans on that totally awkward day. Valentine's Day used to make me uncomfortable.

February 14 and the week leading up to it (February 11 specifically) have increasingly become important days in my life, marking the start of new beginnings. These include moments of disappointment, confusion, frustration, joy, and excitement.

One year after the T-Bell incident, I sat in the clubhouse of a fancy country club in Bethesda with three other women as part of an interview for the job I now have. (Free food, not stolen!)

One year minus three days after that Craig showed up at my apartment door with a ring... and then my mom popped out from around the corner... and then the four of us (my parents, Craig, and I) got my car stuck in the snow after dinner.

+++

Perhaps because I am in a comfy place in all my relationships right now, I decided I really like Valentine's Day. Even though my own Valentine is in Pittsburgh today, I was thrilled to celebrate the day, donning red tights, polkadots, and bringing homemade brownies* and blondies** to church.

+++

One of the ways that the past few years have formed me is that I've learned to open my heart and I've learned to love better. Recently, God has been forming me to open my heart more to him and to realize that he loves me best. He loves us well, through the expression of grace. This grace saves us, but it also shows up in our daily lives, opening doors and shutting others. This grace also shows up at just the right moment or at just any ol' moment in small or unexpected ways.

Nothing is more worth celebrating.

+++

PS - *make these brownies and **make these blondies. you won't be sorry.